On my inner mean girl

“I wish I looked as good as I feel” I said to myself this morning. 
“When people meet me, they’re probably disappointed that I don’t look better than I am” 
These are the thoughts rambling about my head today, and it’s not ok. 
I’m a firm believer that body image affects us all, big or small, because we haven’t dealt with our inner voices that tear us down. 
You can lose all the weight in the world and build all the muscle in the world but if you can’t speak KINDLY to yourself and love yourself in your current imperfections, how on earth can you expect to love yourself when you’re at your goal weight? 
The truth is you won’t. 
The truth is you’ll be disappointed that the girl staring back at you is the same girl, and you’ll be sad. 
You’ll feel good, you’ll have more energy and you’ll have all those things you hoped you’d have, but you’ll still feel not done yet. 
You’ll still feel incomplete. 
Because the real work starts in the heart. 
The real work starts with strengthening your MIND. 
I should wake up and tell myself daily that I look FREAKING AMAZING but instead I’m brought down by this little layer of fat? Maybe it’s just skin? My mind is so bent I can’t even tell you what it is. 
The truth is exercise is important. Eating healthy is important.
But if you lose the ability to move your legs one day and suddenly you have it all ripped from you and you have to sit with yourself every day and you gain a few pounds, are you less worthy? 


Are you less worthy? 


No! You’re freaking not! 
You should wake up every morning and look at yourself in the mirror and think I’M A FRICKEN GODDESS YAAAAAS!  
This is not a mindset reserved for the fit and thin! This is available to everyone right freaking now if you just CHOOSE IT!
Yes still work towards a healthy lifestyle, have strength goals, have Self LOVE goals but for fricks sake love your life and love your damn body. 

What’s wrong with the world where someone like ME has tears in her eyes as she takes these photos? 
If you’re overweight let me tell you, SKINNY ISNT THE CURE TO YOUR LOATHING. 
It’s just not. 
You have to work on you. You have to fight more than weights. More than food. More than sore muscles. 
You have to fight your inner demons. 
And that why so many fail, and that is why so many of my clients succeed. I’m here to tell you, we are worth more. We fight these vicious thoughts. 
We fight. 
I won’t find the love I desire by cutting 700 calories and carb cycling. 
I’ll find it by telling myself every day I’m freaking powerful. 
I’m strong. 
I’m beautiful. 
Here’s to living loved. 

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4 thoughts on “On my inner mean girl

  1. What is this little layer of fat you seem to think you can see!? I don’t see it. You are so capable of inspiring and encouraging yourself and others. You don’t have to be at your interpretation of PERFECTION to do that. Actually in a lot of ways, it is easier to inspire others if you aren’t perfect, as they will have an easier time relating to you.

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    1. YESSSS NAILED IT KAYLEIGH! That’s my POINT is that I don’t have one and I STILL beat on myself!! It’s not ok!! You nailed it girl, perfect isn’t relatable. Thanks soooo much

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  2. Do you think you were upset because you’re not seeing results from working out five days a week and you have this pressure to look a certain way because your selling products that are not transforming your body the way you hoped

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    1. Not at all! Beachbody promotes all body types but I definitely have pressure from myself by looking at other fitness people out there and thinking I should look that way and that’s the problem! I shouldn’t have to look ANY way to be fit and healthy! And it’d be SO easy to blame the product which is why so many people quit but I take ownership of the fact that I haven’t followed the foods I’ve been given to a T, I am a mom of two and when the kids are up I don’t get to finish every workout, I don’t do the extra workouts in the guide and I’m 9 months post partum! The point is, we all need to cut ourselves some SLACK and get less results focused and more heart focused ❀️

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